20 July 2006

Looking back

Today, the kids in my school had a chance to use their own clothes to school instead of their school uniforms. I too took the oppotunity to be all comfortable with jeans and a red t-shirt I designed and drew last year.

But what struck me today that got me smiling was my former form class, 3 Diligence (2005).

They probably didn't notice me as I perched my head over the parapet on the third floor and saw the girls in the class have a friendly class game of captain's ball. Looking at the way they played, it dawned on me that these girls had matured somehow from the time I taught them last year. Even in the game, they looked more motivated and focused. From Michelle (grown prettier) to Rachel (less rebellious) to Clarissa (just as sweet) to Slow Pok (oops! :)), all of them looked like they had grown up, in a way that made me proud of them.

Somehow I missed them, and really, like a mother that had to give up her child for adoption, I felt sad in a way when I didn't follow them up to Sec 4. I do miss them somehow.. even Xun Fu who says "Hi" to me when he sees me along the corridor.

I wished the boys would grow up too, and be more focused in their studies. From the likes of Gifford, to Joel, to Benson and even Xun Fu, I felt each of them had so much more potential. They just needed to work harder.

So yes, girls - proud of you and miss teaching you... Take care, and study hard!

:)

starfish

12 July 2006

Updates...

Alfred called out from afar yesterday just as I was coming back from buying lunch - "Miss Chew, you've not updated your blog for a month!"

In partial guilt, I'm taking some time now to do so just before I head on to do more work.

Lesson observation today. I had expected my Sec 2 Integrity to display the same kind of enthusiasm when we were playing the Atomic Bomb game, but I think they were frightened by the fact that there was another person in class observing what was going on. What more? He is from the Discipline Committee. I guess it didn't dawn on them that I was being observed, not they. And it was highly legitimate for them to do lots of talking for the group activity. On the contrary, they whispered, and "shhhh-ed". I tried to liven things up, but only for a while. I lost my usual Sec 2 Integrity for a while.

I guess you could say I felt disappointed when lesson ended. Probably cos it worked much better when I did the activity with Sec 2 Unity last year. They could put the clues together faster, and they argued better. They were vocal, and they were eagerly participating - all in front of the P and VP. Not that I was blaming my current class. It just made me miss the magic of 2 Unity last year.

I guess I have to accept the fact that I can't always have the same kind of class. That's the magic of the classroom. Each class I teach each day is different, and really, lesson plans are but plans when eventually, you throw it away cos the dynamics of the class is not taken into consideration in that plan. Not to say that it is not useful. It's just that we can't always be following it like the bible.

LCE lessons today was unusual. I held it outside the library and really, it wasn't the choicest spot. Nevertheless, I made do with what I had. I didn't want to wander to far off so the kids could start lessons immediately. I went through with them about relationships, about peer pressure, about self-control. I went through with them about being gentlemen, and about being aware of their surroundings. I wonder how much went through to them. I wonder how many of them will go home and realise that the world is not just about them. I wonder how many of them will start saying "thank you" or think about others first before himself.

I truly hope that for all I'm doing, at least some of my students will be touched somehow. The starfish remains my icon, and a reminder for me of the starfish story. I may not be able to make a difference in all their lives, but at least I made a difference to those I could make a difference to. At the end of the day, I don't think my teaching career is about how high I climb, or if I've gotten votes for the most popular teacher. I think it's about making a difference, and really when I think about it, those that made a difference in my life are usually the ones that are brutally truthful and told me straight in the face how I should be changing for the better. I used to hate these people. Now I know better and hold them dear.

I hope my students form the habit of quesitoning and reflection. That's something wonderful I've learnt through philosophy. It sets one thinking and not take things at face value. It has also brought me into a new world of creativity and discovery. I still remember the fun I had in NUS when we had a discussion board (literally - marker and whiteboard kind!) where we will pose questions which will spark a series of arguments. Maybe for starters, let's think about this statement one of my NT students asked in class today, "If you say practice makes perfect, and if none of us is perfect, then why bother practising?"

So, practice or don't practice?