I have never met such a nice doctor as Dr Ng.
Following my check up with him on Monday, I had doubts as to whether I was supposed to eat one whole guava a day, or one serving.. And was I supposed to eat the seeds? Cos many people told me the seeds will cause me to have constipation.
And so when Pamela went to see him for her check up yesterday, I sent her on a mission to find out from Dr Ng about my guava query. Pam confirmed it was one whole guava, and yes, I can eat the seeds.
My handphone rang this afternoon. I was wondering who "private number" could be. It was Dr Ng on the other line. He apologised for not being to explain fully to Pam about the guava question cos he had lots of patients. So he explained to me in detail again. Yes, it's one whole guava. Half is fine too if one is too much. And yes, I can eat the seeds if I like (cos that's the sweetest part of the fruit!). He explained that he knew old folk tale will tell you that it causes constipation, but it's not true. He told me that the seeds just cannot be digested, much like grape seeds, and chilli seeds. All will be passed out eventually. He asked if I was OK with the rest of the medication, and if I needed anything else. He would be on reservist for the next two weeks and if I have any questions, I can call the nurses at the clinic, and they will contact him. He told me to tell Pam the same thing too. He had wanted to call her himself, but the nurses couldn't find the card at that time. He ended off by telling me to take good care of myself.
I hung up the phone and smiled. I told myself "He is really such a nice and committed doctor". He told me earlier that he was following up with his patients to see if they were OK before he goes into camp. I asked myself if I would have the same level of commitment when I become a full-fledged teacher. His patience never seem to wear out, and he never fails to keep his cool and professionalism. Will I be the same when I become a teacher?
I started thinking about the people I meet in my life. I look at my friends and see what I can learn from them. Debby and I were talking on the train just on Friday, and we said we admired Pam for being so chirpy and cheery always. I said she had an infectious smile, and she just makes people happy with her presence. Debby agreed. We wondered what drives her... In a way, I guess I should learn to be like her - spread life's happiness to everyone by just smiling... :)
And just to make you smile.. Here's some news my brother told me... He told me he heard this in the news - In India, there was a farmer, who had a bag of diamonds. He dropped the bag of diamonds in a pile of hay, and couldn't retrieve all of it. His cow ate the hay, and the diamonds in the process. And so now, everyday, he collects the piles of cow dung, and digs through the pile of dung to retrieve his diamonds... And to make things worse, he has to wait longer to get all his diamonds back cos cows have four stomachs (and thus take longer to digest the hay). And to make the story so complete, he can't kill the cow and open its stomach cos in India, cows are sacred. :)
31 January 2004
29 January 2004
A balance in life - and of love and marriages
I must have slept too much on the train from Boon Lay to Pasir Ris cos I can't seem to get to sleep now. I have an early class tomorrow, but I am wide-eyed. And so, I began to re-read one of my favourite blogs.
The writer talks about not doing too many things, but doing one thing at a time to perfection. And if I may quote, "Most people spent all their lives chasing their dreams till they die & try to give all kinds of reasons. True dreamers attain dreams one at a time and make sure each time is a ground breaking result. Never do things for the sake of doing it. Play to win & not play to show that I have done it!"
That got me thinking about striking a balance in life. If you recall, I once wrote about me being a supergirl before I was struck with viral fever that got me hospitalised and helpless for a whole month. It got me thinking about what I was doing with my life. It seemed I was game at laying my hands on everything that made me look good. I felt I had to do it all. But things changed. My health didn't allow me to be as gung-ho as before. I was taught how to take a step back.
But now, it seems that I am back to my old habits. I try to do this and that again. I feel I shouldn't be missing out on what life has to offer. I wanted to do it all again. And so, reading the blog made me get in touch with my heart again. I began to ask myself "What matters to you, Deb?" And I guess it's these things I should focus my energy on - and do it to perfection.
It's a balance between taking it all, and letting opportunities slip by. It's a balance between burning yourself out and being too laid back. It's a balance between extending yourself to others, and taking care of yourself. Where should you place yourself? Where should you stand? Life, it seems is in search for the perfect equilibrium. Will I be able to find it one day?
Besides seeking for that balance in life, I have also been seeking two other things. It is my prayer for a long time. I want to give up once in a while, but a nun told me "Pray everyday. If it is something you really want, you will get it." I see the truth of the statement from various perspectives. From a purely religious point of view, we of course believe in miracles. From an NLP point of view, they would say it is the power of the mind willing things to happen. And no doubt, the mind is a powerful weapon.
Pris asked me to read this interesting article on not giving up on marriage in yesterday's LIFE section. You can read the article here. Among the things that the writer mentions, one thing I agree most is the WILL to make marriages work and last. I told Max once that I think all marriages will have their own vulnerabilities. It's whether or not the couple would want to work things out. I told him I needed a guy that would want to work things out should there be a problem, rather than walk out and call it quits. He said there ain't much of such guys left. In my heart, I wish I'd get one of these few rare gems. I wonder if there are any left.
I guess I'll have to wait and see...
The writer talks about not doing too many things, but doing one thing at a time to perfection. And if I may quote, "Most people spent all their lives chasing their dreams till they die & try to give all kinds of reasons. True dreamers attain dreams one at a time and make sure each time is a ground breaking result. Never do things for the sake of doing it. Play to win & not play to show that I have done it!"
That got me thinking about striking a balance in life. If you recall, I once wrote about me being a supergirl before I was struck with viral fever that got me hospitalised and helpless for a whole month. It got me thinking about what I was doing with my life. It seemed I was game at laying my hands on everything that made me look good. I felt I had to do it all. But things changed. My health didn't allow me to be as gung-ho as before. I was taught how to take a step back.
But now, it seems that I am back to my old habits. I try to do this and that again. I feel I shouldn't be missing out on what life has to offer. I wanted to do it all again. And so, reading the blog made me get in touch with my heart again. I began to ask myself "What matters to you, Deb?" And I guess it's these things I should focus my energy on - and do it to perfection.
It's a balance between taking it all, and letting opportunities slip by. It's a balance between burning yourself out and being too laid back. It's a balance between extending yourself to others, and taking care of yourself. Where should you place yourself? Where should you stand? Life, it seems is in search for the perfect equilibrium. Will I be able to find it one day?
Besides seeking for that balance in life, I have also been seeking two other things. It is my prayer for a long time. I want to give up once in a while, but a nun told me "Pray everyday. If it is something you really want, you will get it." I see the truth of the statement from various perspectives. From a purely religious point of view, we of course believe in miracles. From an NLP point of view, they would say it is the power of the mind willing things to happen. And no doubt, the mind is a powerful weapon.
Pris asked me to read this interesting article on not giving up on marriage in yesterday's LIFE section. You can read the article here. Among the things that the writer mentions, one thing I agree most is the WILL to make marriages work and last. I told Max once that I think all marriages will have their own vulnerabilities. It's whether or not the couple would want to work things out. I told him I needed a guy that would want to work things out should there be a problem, rather than walk out and call it quits. He said there ain't much of such guys left. In my heart, I wish I'd get one of these few rare gems. I wonder if there are any left.
I guess I'll have to wait and see...
27 January 2004
At home
I am all alone at home now. After a long nap in my papasan chair, and a nice warm shower, I made myself lunch. The lingering smell of freshly toasted bread makes me smile as the sun begin to peep behind the grey clouds. It was just minutes ago that the clouds let down a light trickle of rain. It was as if it was washing the gloom of the day away.
In the background, I have the soft sounds of Danny Wright playing on his piano - my favourite musical instrument. I attempted to learn how to play the piano years back. But I gave up. I figured it was just as good appreciating the music that came from it. Til today, my heart softens each time someone plays the piano.. especially if it were a guy.
In front of me, I have my textbook on Classroom Management The book looks as new as when I had bought it from the bookshop some three weeks back. Maybe later I will start to read it.
In the meantime, I am just enjoying my day. Today.
In the background, I have the soft sounds of Danny Wright playing on his piano - my favourite musical instrument. I attempted to learn how to play the piano years back. But I gave up. I figured it was just as good appreciating the music that came from it. Til today, my heart softens each time someone plays the piano.. especially if it were a guy.
In front of me, I have my textbook on Classroom Management The book looks as new as when I had bought it from the bookshop some three weeks back. Maybe later I will start to read it.
In the meantime, I am just enjoying my day. Today.
26 January 2004
Me and my tummy
My stomach hasn't been too well lately. Pain comes on and off, and I alternate between feeling perfectly fine one minute, and crouching in pain the next. The pain was excruciating last night before I slept, and so I curled myself up in my papasan chair and went to sleep, hoping the pain will go away. It didn't. This morning, I woke up feeling awful. The stomach still hurt, and I felt like vomiting. For a moment, I felt pregnant.
Still, I dragged myself to school, hoping that the pain will go away like it did on other days. But the pain still lingered on. I managed to pull through 4 hours of class before conceding defeat. I called my favourite doctor up to check if he'd be in. I was relieved to know he would be in. And so, after meeting Pam, Chen Ying and Debby to pass to them the English notes I photocopied for the class, I made my way to the clinic.
I waited for another hour or so before I could see Dr Ng. But it was worth the wait. I enjoy going to see Dr Ng each time I have a medical problem. He is so patient and nice, he makes you feel all so well almost immediately. He will take great pains to explain to you why such and such happens, and will throw out to you all the possible scenario of the symptom you're experiencing. He'd even whip up his picture book so you'd have a better visual understanding of what's going on in your internal system.
And so Dr Ng explained and explained, asked questions, explained again, and told me what he would do.. Check my stomach, listen to it, and the rest of the procedures which I refuse to elaborate here. :P In all, he spent close to an hour with me in the room. He told me he would be leaving the clinic soon. He'd be going to SGH, specialising in plastic surgery. He left me his email address so that should I need to consult him in the future, I can contact him. The he went through my whole file and checked every single past ailment to check if I was OK. He even paused to tell me a joke! He ended off the session telling me to take care, and eat a guava a day.
I felt bad I took up so much of Dr Ng's time, and I pitied whoever was after me. That person must have been cursing under his breath!
With a bagful of pills and medication, I dragged myself home. The medication was supposed to help me purge, so my stomach will feel better. I have yet to purge. I keep eating, but nothing happens. The pain has lessened, and I am on MC tomorrow. Life feels good.. :)
Tomorrow, I will take the day off. I will psych myself back to the study mode. I will be less stressed about Spanish, and think a way out of it. My doctor asked me today if I was stressed. I said "no", but at the back of my head, I think I was stressed with Spanish class.
Hopefully, my tum tum will feel better tomorrow.
Still, I dragged myself to school, hoping that the pain will go away like it did on other days. But the pain still lingered on. I managed to pull through 4 hours of class before conceding defeat. I called my favourite doctor up to check if he'd be in. I was relieved to know he would be in. And so, after meeting Pam, Chen Ying and Debby to pass to them the English notes I photocopied for the class, I made my way to the clinic.
I waited for another hour or so before I could see Dr Ng. But it was worth the wait. I enjoy going to see Dr Ng each time I have a medical problem. He is so patient and nice, he makes you feel all so well almost immediately. He will take great pains to explain to you why such and such happens, and will throw out to you all the possible scenario of the symptom you're experiencing. He'd even whip up his picture book so you'd have a better visual understanding of what's going on in your internal system.
And so Dr Ng explained and explained, asked questions, explained again, and told me what he would do.. Check my stomach, listen to it, and the rest of the procedures which I refuse to elaborate here. :P In all, he spent close to an hour with me in the room. He told me he would be leaving the clinic soon. He'd be going to SGH, specialising in plastic surgery. He left me his email address so that should I need to consult him in the future, I can contact him. The he went through my whole file and checked every single past ailment to check if I was OK. He even paused to tell me a joke! He ended off the session telling me to take care, and eat a guava a day.
I felt bad I took up so much of Dr Ng's time, and I pitied whoever was after me. That person must have been cursing under his breath!
With a bagful of pills and medication, I dragged myself home. The medication was supposed to help me purge, so my stomach will feel better. I have yet to purge. I keep eating, but nothing happens. The pain has lessened, and I am on MC tomorrow. Life feels good.. :)
Tomorrow, I will take the day off. I will psych myself back to the study mode. I will be less stressed about Spanish, and think a way out of it. My doctor asked me today if I was stressed. I said "no", but at the back of my head, I think I was stressed with Spanish class.
Hopefully, my tum tum will feel better tomorrow.
25 January 2004
Holiday's Ended
Today spells the last day of the long weekend. Chinese New Year came and went, and if anything, I think I've gained two kilograms feasting throughout the four days. I don't understand how we all can say we are so full, we can't take in anymore food, and with each passing day, vow that we will eat less the next day, and yet when the next day comes, the whole cycle starts over again. And we eat ourselves sick.
My uncle just came over for lunch. We had yesterday's leftovers - lots of it. As usual, when my mum cooks, she does so as if she was cooking for an army of hungry men. My refrigerator is full with food, I don't know which to finish first. You name it, I've got it. Not to mention all the cookies and kueh kueh.
Yesterday, I had my friends over and my mum had her friends over for dinner. The last of our guests left close to 1am. And despite all the feasting, I have enough food to feed at least 40 more people. I think that will be my brother and mine dinner for the next week, after which, I will resemble a popiah!
Anyhow, it was great having my friends over again. We had a fun time playing with Keith. He's really cute and adorable. We were taking turns to carry him and playing with him... He's just so adorable - just like his mummy (and godmas! ;-) Right Pris?) I had Wendy and Jeff over too, and Pris came with Roy, and Roy's friend, Martin came too. The world is really small cos Martin happen to know one of Wendy's friend too. We're all planning to do rock climbing the week after next. They were also persuading me to take up diving.. I told them one day, when I overcome my fear of the water.
This morning, I woke up later than usual. I slept in my comfortable papasan chair. I cuurled myself up like a baby and let the cool breeze fan me to sleep as I hugged my heart-shaped pillow and Huggy Bear. As I opened my eyes, I dreaded the thought that it was already Sunday. Tomorrow, I will be back to school - a long day, and Spanish class of course. I have not progressed at all since the last lesson I attended.
There's work for me to do, lessons to prepare for and notes to file. But somehow, I don't feel like doing any of these. I feel like lazing around some more, and wish tomorrow is yet another holiday where I can laze by the pool and tan myself black. I wish it wouldn't rain so much so that I can go rollerblading or jogging or swimming... But the dark clouds hover and threaten to rain down huge drops of water like it did so last night. The holiday has ended, and reality starts to sink in. I have to get back to school tomorrow. I had better hit the books now.
My uncle just came over for lunch. We had yesterday's leftovers - lots of it. As usual, when my mum cooks, she does so as if she was cooking for an army of hungry men. My refrigerator is full with food, I don't know which to finish first. You name it, I've got it. Not to mention all the cookies and kueh kueh.
Yesterday, I had my friends over and my mum had her friends over for dinner. The last of our guests left close to 1am. And despite all the feasting, I have enough food to feed at least 40 more people. I think that will be my brother and mine dinner for the next week, after which, I will resemble a popiah!
Anyhow, it was great having my friends over again. We had a fun time playing with Keith. He's really cute and adorable. We were taking turns to carry him and playing with him... He's just so adorable - just like his mummy (and godmas! ;-) Right Pris?) I had Wendy and Jeff over too, and Pris came with Roy, and Roy's friend, Martin came too. The world is really small cos Martin happen to know one of Wendy's friend too. We're all planning to do rock climbing the week after next. They were also persuading me to take up diving.. I told them one day, when I overcome my fear of the water.
This morning, I woke up later than usual. I slept in my comfortable papasan chair. I cuurled myself up like a baby and let the cool breeze fan me to sleep as I hugged my heart-shaped pillow and Huggy Bear. As I opened my eyes, I dreaded the thought that it was already Sunday. Tomorrow, I will be back to school - a long day, and Spanish class of course. I have not progressed at all since the last lesson I attended.
There's work for me to do, lessons to prepare for and notes to file. But somehow, I don't feel like doing any of these. I feel like lazing around some more, and wish tomorrow is yet another holiday where I can laze by the pool and tan myself black. I wish it wouldn't rain so much so that I can go rollerblading or jogging or swimming... But the dark clouds hover and threaten to rain down huge drops of water like it did so last night. The holiday has ended, and reality starts to sink in. I have to get back to school tomorrow. I had better hit the books now.
23 January 2004
Chinese New Year spells EAT!
Yesterday and today, thousands of Chinese Singaporeans celebrate the Lunar New Year. Dressed in new clothes, some rather awkwardly so, they all trot around Singapore carrying mandarin oranges, visiting relatives near and far. I did my fair share of visiting with my family too. We started off the day yesterday with Mass. Fr Alex gave us a very good homily that taught us that though we are Catholics, we can still celebrate Chinese New Year, which is by no means a paganistic practise. He spoke about how we should embrace the good practices of the holiday, such as the reunion dinner, filial piety and respect for the elders. Senseless superstitions, should however be thrown out. And by the end of the homily, we all learnt how best to wish each other during the season.
After Mass, we travelled from east to west to visit my uncle. There, we had a sumptuous meal of steamboat and lots and lots and lots of other food. My aunt specially steamed a whole pomfret for me, which I had to finish right down to the bone dutifully. It didn't help that I was not in a fish mood, and all I wanted to eat was meat... BEEF!!
Speaking of beef, the night before, my family had our reunion dinner at the Town restaurant at the Fullerton Hotel. It was really nice. We dined al fresco, with the colour of the orange sunset in the background. We tossed the yu sheng, and ate to our hearts' content. I was delighted with the chunks of beef and pork at the buffet line. I munched with glee and savoured every little morsel of the meat. I think I took at least five servings of each meat. I looked very much like a carnivore! It was also a pleasant surprise to see some of the chefs formerly from Raffles Hotel all working there. For a moment, I had five chefs, all in tall hats, standing in front of me and shaking my free hand. They asked where I was working, said it was nice to see me, said Fullerton is the number one hotel now.... etc.... I swore they were staring at the plate which I was carrying with the other hand. It was filled with chunks of beef and pork, drowned with black pepper sauce and chilli sauce. I felt embarassed for a moment. It looked like I had taken too much beef and there were five chefs interrogating me of my steal!
The eating continued. After the visit to my uncle's home, we came back home, had a three hour nap before heading off to my granduncle's home for dinner.. yes, more food! My uncle was making me try this cookie, and that kueh, and this tart, and that pastry. And just as I thought I was done, my grandaunt called out that dinner was ready! And so, we ate again... I came back home feeling very very bloated and thirsty. I think there was too much salt in her food... whatever...
And just as you thought the eating had stopped, my mum and brother decided to drop by Swensen's on the way home. We got a pint of ice-cream, proceeded home and had that and other kueh kueh at 10.30pm over green tea!
It was way past midnight, but I couldn't sleep. I felt my stomach bursting. I wondered why I ever did torture myself with so much food. Why do we Singaporeans eat and not stop? Why does food always bring people together?
I spoke with Wendy over the phone, who told me she was eating non-stop too. We decided to do some form of exercise the next day (i.e. today). We had it all planned. We were careful not to speak too loud lest the sky should hear us. But our efforts were in vain. I got up this morning and looked at the sky. Yesterday's blue sky had disappeared. In its place were thick grey clouds, ready to release litres of water. Soon, big drops of water came pouring down. Our exercise plans were spoilt!
Tomorrow, my family will have our close friends over for dinner. The usual gang will be here, eating again. My mum has had a full menu planned... I just finished making agar agar. Tomorrow, I will have to get up early to steam yam cake. My mum will get the remaining ingredients for the popiah. We have a total of 15 dishes to serve, excluding all the new year cookies and the chocolates I have been popping in my mouth. I think we have too much food. The thought of it gives me indigestion. But I love feeding my friends, and so does my mum... hence the food.
Oh well, we are thankful CNY comes only once a year. Before leaving my granduncle's home yesterday, he reminded us to go to his home again on the 15th day of CNY... there will be yet another feast.
Chinese New Year - it just spells food for me. I love it, yet I hate it. Can some smart scientist please invent some gene to implant in all women, that we can eat all we want, and yet not put on an ounce? If only...
After Mass, we travelled from east to west to visit my uncle. There, we had a sumptuous meal of steamboat and lots and lots and lots of other food. My aunt specially steamed a whole pomfret for me, which I had to finish right down to the bone dutifully. It didn't help that I was not in a fish mood, and all I wanted to eat was meat... BEEF!!
Speaking of beef, the night before, my family had our reunion dinner at the Town restaurant at the Fullerton Hotel. It was really nice. We dined al fresco, with the colour of the orange sunset in the background. We tossed the yu sheng, and ate to our hearts' content. I was delighted with the chunks of beef and pork at the buffet line. I munched with glee and savoured every little morsel of the meat. I think I took at least five servings of each meat. I looked very much like a carnivore! It was also a pleasant surprise to see some of the chefs formerly from Raffles Hotel all working there. For a moment, I had five chefs, all in tall hats, standing in front of me and shaking my free hand. They asked where I was working, said it was nice to see me, said Fullerton is the number one hotel now.... etc.... I swore they were staring at the plate which I was carrying with the other hand. It was filled with chunks of beef and pork, drowned with black pepper sauce and chilli sauce. I felt embarassed for a moment. It looked like I had taken too much beef and there were five chefs interrogating me of my steal!
The eating continued. After the visit to my uncle's home, we came back home, had a three hour nap before heading off to my granduncle's home for dinner.. yes, more food! My uncle was making me try this cookie, and that kueh, and this tart, and that pastry. And just as I thought I was done, my grandaunt called out that dinner was ready! And so, we ate again... I came back home feeling very very bloated and thirsty. I think there was too much salt in her food... whatever...
And just as you thought the eating had stopped, my mum and brother decided to drop by Swensen's on the way home. We got a pint of ice-cream, proceeded home and had that and other kueh kueh at 10.30pm over green tea!
It was way past midnight, but I couldn't sleep. I felt my stomach bursting. I wondered why I ever did torture myself with so much food. Why do we Singaporeans eat and not stop? Why does food always bring people together?
I spoke with Wendy over the phone, who told me she was eating non-stop too. We decided to do some form of exercise the next day (i.e. today). We had it all planned. We were careful not to speak too loud lest the sky should hear us. But our efforts were in vain. I got up this morning and looked at the sky. Yesterday's blue sky had disappeared. In its place were thick grey clouds, ready to release litres of water. Soon, big drops of water came pouring down. Our exercise plans were spoilt!
Tomorrow, my family will have our close friends over for dinner. The usual gang will be here, eating again. My mum has had a full menu planned... I just finished making agar agar. Tomorrow, I will have to get up early to steam yam cake. My mum will get the remaining ingredients for the popiah. We have a total of 15 dishes to serve, excluding all the new year cookies and the chocolates I have been popping in my mouth. I think we have too much food. The thought of it gives me indigestion. But I love feeding my friends, and so does my mum... hence the food.
Oh well, we are thankful CNY comes only once a year. Before leaving my granduncle's home yesterday, he reminded us to go to his home again on the 15th day of CNY... there will be yet another feast.
Chinese New Year - it just spells food for me. I love it, yet I hate it. Can some smart scientist please invent some gene to implant in all women, that we can eat all we want, and yet not put on an ounce? If only...
20 January 2004
The Cookie Thief
My guidance and couselling tutor shared with us this poem last week. It teaches us not to jump into conclusion and to check our facts first before making assumptions... It's called The Cookie Thief
The Cookie Thief
A woman was waiting at an airport one night
With several long hours before her flight
She hunted for a book in the airport shop
Bought a bag of cookies and found a place to drop
She was engrossed in her book, but happened to see,
That the man beside her, as bold as could be,
Grabbed a cookie or two from the bag between,
Which she tried to ignore, to avoid a scene.
She read, munched the cookies,a nd watched the clock,
As the gutsy "cookie thief" diminished her stock,
She was getting more irritated as the minutes ticked by,
Thinking, "If I wasn't so nice, I'd blacken his eye!"
With each cookie she took, he took one too.
When only one was left, she wondered what he'd do.
With a smile on his face and a nervous laugh,
He took the last cookie and broke it in half.
He offered her half, as he ate the other.
She snatched it from him and thought, "Oh brother,
This guy has some nerve, and he's also rude,
Why, he didn't even show any gratitude!"
She didn't know when she had been so galled,
And sighed with relief when her flight was called.
She gathered her belongings and headed for the gate,
Refusing to look back at the "thieving ingrate."
She boarded the plane and sank in her seat,
Then sought her book, which was almost complete.
As she reached her baggage, she gasped with surprise:
There was her bag of cookies in front of her eyes!
"If mine are here," she moaned with despair,
"Then the others were his and he tried to share!"
Too late to apologise, she realised with grief,
That she was the rude one, the ingrate, the thief!
(From a 3rd serving of Chicken Soup for the Soul)
The Cookie Thief
A woman was waiting at an airport one night
With several long hours before her flight
She hunted for a book in the airport shop
Bought a bag of cookies and found a place to drop
She was engrossed in her book, but happened to see,
That the man beside her, as bold as could be,
Grabbed a cookie or two from the bag between,
Which she tried to ignore, to avoid a scene.
She read, munched the cookies,a nd watched the clock,
As the gutsy "cookie thief" diminished her stock,
She was getting more irritated as the minutes ticked by,
Thinking, "If I wasn't so nice, I'd blacken his eye!"
With each cookie she took, he took one too.
When only one was left, she wondered what he'd do.
With a smile on his face and a nervous laugh,
He took the last cookie and broke it in half.
He offered her half, as he ate the other.
She snatched it from him and thought, "Oh brother,
This guy has some nerve, and he's also rude,
Why, he didn't even show any gratitude!"
She didn't know when she had been so galled,
And sighed with relief when her flight was called.
She gathered her belongings and headed for the gate,
Refusing to look back at the "thieving ingrate."
She boarded the plane and sank in her seat,
Then sought her book, which was almost complete.
As she reached her baggage, she gasped with surprise:
There was her bag of cookies in front of her eyes!
"If mine are here," she moaned with despair,
"Then the others were his and he tried to share!"
Too late to apologise, she realised with grief,
That she was the rude one, the ingrate, the thief!
(From a 3rd serving of Chicken Soup for the Soul)
Thanks for the poem
The poem that Pris wrote made me realise that I am not the only one who feel lonely and heavy hearted sometimes. I am sure all of you have felt like that some time or other in your part of your life. The poem also brings me back to my secondary school days, when Pris and I would pen down our thoughts and feelings in stanzas, trying to make things rhyme. We told ourselves that we'd compile a book of poems some time soon. When we left school, I stopped the poem-writing. I guess Pris continued. Now, she's got me going again.
I skipped my Spanish class proudly yesterday. Didn't even feel a sense of guilt. I was psychologically unprepared, and so, I decided not to go. I felt happy that I had saved myself the trauma of feeling small and like an idiot again. Yesterday during English class, I had successfully memorised the numbers one to ten in Spanish. Slowly, but surely, I know I will get there...
Cake-baking continued last night at home. My mum watched with glee as I did the finishing touches of the sugee cake. I covered the cake with marzipan, and even made little mandarin oranges (complete with leaves) and red packets to be placed on top of the cake. My granduncle and grandaunt will be happy people today. They thoroughly enjoy the sugee cake I bake, and look forward to it every Chinese New Year. My mum has two loaves of the cake in the fridge. She looked pleased with her stash last night. I think in her head, she was mentally rationing the cake, thinking how much to eat per day so that there will be some left for guests when they come on Saturday.
Pris wrote me a beautiful email last night that brought me to tears. I was confused and needed someone to give me an objective point of view. As usual, she has never failed to provide that. What she wrote touched my heart, and set me thinking straight again. I feel much better now. I feel that I am moving on with life.
I start the day today with a lighter heart. With sincere prayers, I know things will show its way soon...
I skipped my Spanish class proudly yesterday. Didn't even feel a sense of guilt. I was psychologically unprepared, and so, I decided not to go. I felt happy that I had saved myself the trauma of feeling small and like an idiot again. Yesterday during English class, I had successfully memorised the numbers one to ten in Spanish. Slowly, but surely, I know I will get there...
Cake-baking continued last night at home. My mum watched with glee as I did the finishing touches of the sugee cake. I covered the cake with marzipan, and even made little mandarin oranges (complete with leaves) and red packets to be placed on top of the cake. My granduncle and grandaunt will be happy people today. They thoroughly enjoy the sugee cake I bake, and look forward to it every Chinese New Year. My mum has two loaves of the cake in the fridge. She looked pleased with her stash last night. I think in her head, she was mentally rationing the cake, thinking how much to eat per day so that there will be some left for guests when they come on Saturday.
Pris wrote me a beautiful email last night that brought me to tears. I was confused and needed someone to give me an objective point of view. As usual, she has never failed to provide that. What she wrote touched my heart, and set me thinking straight again. I feel much better now. I feel that I am moving on with life.
I start the day today with a lighter heart. With sincere prayers, I know things will show its way soon...
18 January 2004
Fixed the problem...
Finally, I found out what happened to make my comments facility disappear. Apparently, the Blogspeak that I've been using has closed down, and has been takem over by Haloscan... and so, all the past comments which you all posted have disappeared. The good news is that you all can post your comments once again. The bad news is that the colour is not that attractive, and I have no control over it.. Oh well, as they say in Hokkien.. "No fish, prawn also can".
I don't believe school has started for a week already. I am still in a holiday mood. In stark contrast to last semester, I feel so switched off this semester. Perhaps it's cos I haven't really got over the holidays yet, and in my mind, I'm thinking - hey Chinese New Year's just around the corner.. then it's Hari Raya Haji! Holidays, holidays, holidays.. Or it's perhaps I have gotten used to the work load, or perhaps, I feel I don't have to prove myself so hard anymore... or perhaps, I just have other things on my mind.
I had a good dinner over the weekend with Pris, Lee Yee and Gary. Gary's my junior at St Hilda's. We went over to Pris's place and had hor fun, hokkien mee, satay, sweet and sour pork, and baby kailan soaked in oyster sauce... Of course, there was nachos too! It was good just lazing about in her home and playing with baby Keith. Over the weekend, Pris and I have learnt the art of speaking "babynish" - otherwise known as baby language. Keith was all so excited with his eyes bright open at 11pm, talking to us in his own language. He went on louder and louder as Pris and I entertained him with.. "Is it?" "And then?" "Oh..." "Is that what happened?" "ngah.. ngah.. ngah,.." "oooh..." "Yah.. yah.." You get the idea... Gary couldnt' do anything much except tolerate all the cooing three women were doing with a cute baby. He rolled his eyes and shook his head... I guess in his mind, he must have said.. "Women...!"
Roy was away for a dive trip, and so Pris was all alone. It was good for the side dishes to come back to the main platter. Mushy peas over the weekend with fries as fish was away. But it all tasted just as good... right, Pris? ;-) Now that Pris is staying closer to Lee Yee and I, meeting up is just so convenient - just all swell! I really missed them when I was in Sydney...
As I am typing on this blog, I am torn in between helping my mum make pineapple tarts, blogging, filling up some entry form, and of course, revising Spanish. Yes, I dread the lesson now. In my mind, I have pictures of my tutor asking me questions, and I answer with a blank face. In my head, the pictures continue with the rest of my coursemates knowing everything in Spanish. In my head, I feel like an idiot. I know if Uncle Joel was around, he'll tell me to use NLP. The power of visualising.... I should push out all of those negative thoughts out of my head. I should make active all the positive thoughts.. OK, Deborah.. Think positive!!! Trying... Breathe...
And so, the tension continues as I decide what to do, and yes, I remember that Law & Order is on in about 4 minutes time. The temptation of the TV is too great. I give in to it. For tomorrow's lesson, I shall learn the all important phrase in Spanish - lo ciento. me no entiendo... "I'm sorry, I don't understand." :)
Hope you have a good week ahead!
I don't believe school has started for a week already. I am still in a holiday mood. In stark contrast to last semester, I feel so switched off this semester. Perhaps it's cos I haven't really got over the holidays yet, and in my mind, I'm thinking - hey Chinese New Year's just around the corner.. then it's Hari Raya Haji! Holidays, holidays, holidays.. Or it's perhaps I have gotten used to the work load, or perhaps, I feel I don't have to prove myself so hard anymore... or perhaps, I just have other things on my mind.
I had a good dinner over the weekend with Pris, Lee Yee and Gary. Gary's my junior at St Hilda's. We went over to Pris's place and had hor fun, hokkien mee, satay, sweet and sour pork, and baby kailan soaked in oyster sauce... Of course, there was nachos too! It was good just lazing about in her home and playing with baby Keith. Over the weekend, Pris and I have learnt the art of speaking "babynish" - otherwise known as baby language. Keith was all so excited with his eyes bright open at 11pm, talking to us in his own language. He went on louder and louder as Pris and I entertained him with.. "Is it?" "And then?" "Oh..." "Is that what happened?" "ngah.. ngah.. ngah,.." "oooh..." "Yah.. yah.." You get the idea... Gary couldnt' do anything much except tolerate all the cooing three women were doing with a cute baby. He rolled his eyes and shook his head... I guess in his mind, he must have said.. "Women...!"
Roy was away for a dive trip, and so Pris was all alone. It was good for the side dishes to come back to the main platter. Mushy peas over the weekend with fries as fish was away. But it all tasted just as good... right, Pris? ;-) Now that Pris is staying closer to Lee Yee and I, meeting up is just so convenient - just all swell! I really missed them when I was in Sydney...
As I am typing on this blog, I am torn in between helping my mum make pineapple tarts, blogging, filling up some entry form, and of course, revising Spanish. Yes, I dread the lesson now. In my mind, I have pictures of my tutor asking me questions, and I answer with a blank face. In my head, the pictures continue with the rest of my coursemates knowing everything in Spanish. In my head, I feel like an idiot. I know if Uncle Joel was around, he'll tell me to use NLP. The power of visualising.... I should push out all of those negative thoughts out of my head. I should make active all the positive thoughts.. OK, Deborah.. Think positive!!! Trying... Breathe...
And so, the tension continues as I decide what to do, and yes, I remember that Law & Order is on in about 4 minutes time. The temptation of the TV is too great. I give in to it. For tomorrow's lesson, I shall learn the all important phrase in Spanish - lo ciento. me no entiendo... "I'm sorry, I don't understand." :)
Hope you have a good week ahead!
17 January 2004
Some glitches... and some updates
Hmm... It seems the new year has brought on new glitches to my blogsite. Somehow, the comments part decided to go missing, and the site has been in accessible to a few people. When I came back from Sydney, I couldn't even get onto my blog!
And so, here's what I've decided to do. If you wish to post me your comments, just send me an email. You can find a link to my email address just at the left hand margin above the train counter. It's called "send me your thoughts". I figured that will be the best way out until I find out what happened to the comments thingy.
I can't believe Chinese New Year is less than a week away. Didn't Christmas just pass? My room is still in a mess, and I can't quite reckon why. Papers here and there, things are not in order, and I feel uncomfortable. I managed to pack up my cupboards and wardrobe today. I WILL clean up my room by tomorrow, then meet Pris and Lee Yee for dinner, play with my Godson again (yipee!), and if time permits, bake a cake and some brownies for my mum. She's been hinting big time that I should bake something for CNY. Hmmm.. How can you ever say no to your mum?
Well, it is no big secret now that Pam is attached to Ian. I am probably the happiest person, having played matchmaker. I guess nothing beats seeing two of your friends happily attached to each other. Things are going on really well for them, and I am really glad for both of them. Hmm... it's always nice to see people fall in love...
Some things have been on my mind lately - the challenge I mentioned in my poem for one. Just being myself, and all so analytical again, I was thinking just now, and am amazed at how this thing keeps flying in my face. Three times now, and I am still pondering why this opportunity keeps coming back. It seems like it's calling me to take action. I think I will, but I will have a talk with Pris first. On one hand, it feels so right, on the other, I am apprehensive about taking the leap. I think I will need to gather enough courage again, and the confidence to tell myself that I am worthy.
Monday is coming, and I loathe the idea of Spanish class. I have not made much progress and the thought of not knowing anything again in class scares the hell out of me. I can't help but feel demoralised, discouraged, and somewhat dumb. Me no entiendo espanol.... :(
Oh well... Time.. All I need is time...
And so, here's what I've decided to do. If you wish to post me your comments, just send me an email. You can find a link to my email address just at the left hand margin above the train counter. It's called "send me your thoughts". I figured that will be the best way out until I find out what happened to the comments thingy.
I can't believe Chinese New Year is less than a week away. Didn't Christmas just pass? My room is still in a mess, and I can't quite reckon why. Papers here and there, things are not in order, and I feel uncomfortable. I managed to pack up my cupboards and wardrobe today. I WILL clean up my room by tomorrow, then meet Pris and Lee Yee for dinner, play with my Godson again (yipee!), and if time permits, bake a cake and some brownies for my mum. She's been hinting big time that I should bake something for CNY. Hmmm.. How can you ever say no to your mum?
Well, it is no big secret now that Pam is attached to Ian. I am probably the happiest person, having played matchmaker. I guess nothing beats seeing two of your friends happily attached to each other. Things are going on really well for them, and I am really glad for both of them. Hmm... it's always nice to see people fall in love...
Some things have been on my mind lately - the challenge I mentioned in my poem for one. Just being myself, and all so analytical again, I was thinking just now, and am amazed at how this thing keeps flying in my face. Three times now, and I am still pondering why this opportunity keeps coming back. It seems like it's calling me to take action. I think I will, but I will have a talk with Pris first. On one hand, it feels so right, on the other, I am apprehensive about taking the leap. I think I will need to gather enough courage again, and the confidence to tell myself that I am worthy.
Monday is coming, and I loathe the idea of Spanish class. I have not made much progress and the thought of not knowing anything again in class scares the hell out of me. I can't help but feel demoralised, discouraged, and somewhat dumb. Me no entiendo espanol.... :(
Oh well... Time.. All I need is time...
16 January 2004
A Challenge
A challenge faces me
Am I to take the plunge?
To seize the day
To shout Carpe Diem
Will I take the jump?
I have lived my life
Worrying not about "what ifs"
This time should not be different
Why should I pull myself back?
Why should I give this a miss?
And so I ask myself
What is there to lose
If I should take the chance once more
I could stand to gain this time
And not lose like before
Sure I have had my share
Of tears and hurts and pain
It is not something
I'd like to feel once more
It is not something I'd like to feel again
But I will not experience life to its fullest
I will not stand to gain
If I keep pushing away opportunities at the door
Out of sheer fear
Of what had happened before
And as I gather all the courage that I've left
I take a deep breath of renewed confidence
I put all that has happened behind me
And start with a clean slate
I open my fragile heart once more
With freshly healed wounds
I brave myself to be vulnerable again
So that I may
Experience
The fullness
of
LIFE
and
LOVE
Deborah Anne Chew
Am I to take the plunge?
To seize the day
To shout Carpe Diem
Will I take the jump?
I have lived my life
Worrying not about "what ifs"
This time should not be different
Why should I pull myself back?
Why should I give this a miss?
And so I ask myself
What is there to lose
If I should take the chance once more
I could stand to gain this time
And not lose like before
Sure I have had my share
Of tears and hurts and pain
It is not something
I'd like to feel once more
It is not something I'd like to feel again
But I will not experience life to its fullest
I will not stand to gain
If I keep pushing away opportunities at the door
Out of sheer fear
Of what had happened before
And as I gather all the courage that I've left
I take a deep breath of renewed confidence
I put all that has happened behind me
And start with a clean slate
I open my fragile heart once more
With freshly healed wounds
I brave myself to be vulnerable again
So that I may
Experience
The fullness
of
LIFE
and
LOVE
Deborah Anne Chew
15 January 2004
Masks
I am thoroughly enjoying my Guidance and Counselling class. My tutor is dear young lady bursting with infectious energy and enthusiasm to share her knowledge with us. And she does so with her sweet simplicity, so much so that she makes it seem as though the module is really easy!
What I like most about the sessions so far is that she shares with us a little poem at the end of the lesson, so that what we have learnt gets driven into our heads better. For the first lesson, she shared with hus this poem called "Masks: An Epilogue". This is how it goes...
MASKS: AN EPILOGUE
Don’t be fooled by the face I wear, for I wear a thousand masks,
And none of them are me.
Don’t be fooled, for God’s sake, don’t be fooled.
I give you the impression that I’m secure, that confidence is my name and
Coolness is my game,
And that I need no one. But don’t believe me.
Beneath dwells the real me in confusion, in aloneness, in fear.
That is why I create a mask to hide behind, to shield me from the glance
That knows, but such a glance is precisely my salvation.
That is, if it’s followed by acceptance, if it’s followed by love.
It’s the only thing that can liberate me from my own self-built prison walls.
I’m afraid that deep down I’m nothing and that I’m just no good,
And that you will see this and reject me.
And so begins the parade of masks. Idle chatter to you…
I tell you everything, that’s really nothing, and
Nothing of what’s everything, of what’s crying within me.
Please listen carefully and try to hear what I’m saying.
I’d really like to be genuine and spontaneous, and ME.
But you’ve got to help me. You’ve got to hold out your hand.
Each time you’re kind and gentle, and encouraging,
Each time you try to understand because you really care,
My heart begins to grow wings, very feeble wings, but wings.
With your sensitivity and sympathy, and your power of understanding,
You alone can release me from my shallow world of uncertainty.
It will not be easy for you. The nearer you approach me,
The blinder I may strike back.
But love I’m told is stronger than strong walls,
And in this lies my hope, my only hope.
Please try to beat down these walls with firm hands,
But gentle hands, for a child is very sensitive.
Who am I, you may wonder, I am every man you meet, and
Also every woman that you meet, and I am YOU, also.
Author Unknown
I guess what it teaches us is that anyone we meet, the people we interact with, and perhaps more so with the students I am to teach in the future - all of them (and us, in fact) will at one time or other don a mask - a mask to hide our true inner self. I can empathise deeply with the author. I myself have had my fair share of masks. I change these masks ever so often to suit the occasion, to suit who I am with, and only when I am most comfortable with someone, do I reveal my true self.
What it has taught me is that, what we see in the outer shell of someone, may just be a mask we see. Do we take the time, do we have the patience? Do we ever take notice, and hear the helpless cry of the real person behind these masks? Think about it when we next meet someone. Do we take the time and effort, to hear the inner cry, to realise the real person behind the mask?
What I like most about the sessions so far is that she shares with us a little poem at the end of the lesson, so that what we have learnt gets driven into our heads better. For the first lesson, she shared with hus this poem called "Masks: An Epilogue". This is how it goes...
MASKS: AN EPILOGUE
Don’t be fooled by the face I wear, for I wear a thousand masks,
And none of them are me.
Don’t be fooled, for God’s sake, don’t be fooled.
I give you the impression that I’m secure, that confidence is my name and
Coolness is my game,
And that I need no one. But don’t believe me.
Beneath dwells the real me in confusion, in aloneness, in fear.
That is why I create a mask to hide behind, to shield me from the glance
That knows, but such a glance is precisely my salvation.
That is, if it’s followed by acceptance, if it’s followed by love.
It’s the only thing that can liberate me from my own self-built prison walls.
I’m afraid that deep down I’m nothing and that I’m just no good,
And that you will see this and reject me.
And so begins the parade of masks. Idle chatter to you…
I tell you everything, that’s really nothing, and
Nothing of what’s everything, of what’s crying within me.
Please listen carefully and try to hear what I’m saying.
I’d really like to be genuine and spontaneous, and ME.
But you’ve got to help me. You’ve got to hold out your hand.
Each time you’re kind and gentle, and encouraging,
Each time you try to understand because you really care,
My heart begins to grow wings, very feeble wings, but wings.
With your sensitivity and sympathy, and your power of understanding,
You alone can release me from my shallow world of uncertainty.
It will not be easy for you. The nearer you approach me,
The blinder I may strike back.
But love I’m told is stronger than strong walls,
And in this lies my hope, my only hope.
Please try to beat down these walls with firm hands,
But gentle hands, for a child is very sensitive.
Who am I, you may wonder, I am every man you meet, and
Also every woman that you meet, and I am YOU, also.
Author Unknown
I guess what it teaches us is that anyone we meet, the people we interact with, and perhaps more so with the students I am to teach in the future - all of them (and us, in fact) will at one time or other don a mask - a mask to hide our true inner self. I can empathise deeply with the author. I myself have had my fair share of masks. I change these masks ever so often to suit the occasion, to suit who I am with, and only when I am most comfortable with someone, do I reveal my true self.
What it has taught me is that, what we see in the outer shell of someone, may just be a mask we see. Do we take the time, do we have the patience? Do we ever take notice, and hear the helpless cry of the real person behind these masks? Think about it when we next meet someone. Do we take the time and effort, to hear the inner cry, to realise the real person behind the mask?
13 January 2004
My Spanish Class
Yesterday was a long day at school. I had lessons from 8.30am til 4.30am followed by Spanish class at 7pm til 9.30pm. My heart dropped and my confidence was torn in shreds at the class. Having missed two lessons (cos I was in Sydney), I felt totally lost. I tried to prepare by reading a little of the course materials before class, but I was totally lost. I had even forgotten what I had learnt at the first lesson!
And so, the lesson continued. The teacher tried to be patient. He asked me to listen to the rest as he asked them question after question, all in Spanish.. and they answered fluently and with confidence. It seemed over the two lessons that I had missed, the rest of my classmates had formed alliances and made friends with each other. I felt that I'd be the next person to be voted out had I been on Survivor.
I ploughed through the two hours plus of Spanish class, trying to absorb as much as possible. Everyone seem to know everything - and I looked like a complete idiot... almost an alien. The tutor was nice by asking me simple questions, and I answered simply... I thought I only did well by saying the alphabet correctly - but even then, I read from the book, not by heart.
I left the class with a sunken heart. Am I really that bad? Should I have signed up for the class in the first place? Maybe I shouldn't have had I known I would be missing out on two lessons. Maybe I should have signed up with someone else so I have someone to practise with... Maybe.. And so thoughts filled my head, and with an embarassed smile, I said "thanks" to my tutor. Before I left the class, he told me "I hope you don't give up. You must keep trying."
OK - try I will. My mum was equally encouraging when I told her about last night's class. "Of course, la.. You missed two lessons. Don't worry. You can do it."
With renewed confidence, I picked up the Spanish book Caroline lent me. I carried it with me to school today and it is almost my constant reading companion. Over and over again, I read and re-read the Spanish phrases. I know I can do it, if I try hard enough.
And so, the lesson continued. The teacher tried to be patient. He asked me to listen to the rest as he asked them question after question, all in Spanish.. and they answered fluently and with confidence. It seemed over the two lessons that I had missed, the rest of my classmates had formed alliances and made friends with each other. I felt that I'd be the next person to be voted out had I been on Survivor.
I ploughed through the two hours plus of Spanish class, trying to absorb as much as possible. Everyone seem to know everything - and I looked like a complete idiot... almost an alien. The tutor was nice by asking me simple questions, and I answered simply... I thought I only did well by saying the alphabet correctly - but even then, I read from the book, not by heart.
I left the class with a sunken heart. Am I really that bad? Should I have signed up for the class in the first place? Maybe I shouldn't have had I known I would be missing out on two lessons. Maybe I should have signed up with someone else so I have someone to practise with... Maybe.. And so thoughts filled my head, and with an embarassed smile, I said "thanks" to my tutor. Before I left the class, he told me "I hope you don't give up. You must keep trying."
OK - try I will. My mum was equally encouraging when I told her about last night's class. "Of course, la.. You missed two lessons. Don't worry. You can do it."
With renewed confidence, I picked up the Spanish book Caroline lent me. I carried it with me to school today and it is almost my constant reading companion. Over and over again, I read and re-read the Spanish phrases. I know I can do it, if I try hard enough.
10 January 2004
Back from Sydney!
I am finally back, and based on the feedback I am getting, I think all of you have been visiting my blog daily, awaiting news on how the trip went. Well, for starters, I fell sick during the trip, so it made it less enjoyable. It didn't help that the Aussie dollar became stronger against all currencies as the days progressed, so it made everything there less attractive to buy.
I did learn a few things on the trip though, so not all is wasted. And I did manage to climb the Sydney harbour bridge - yes, we made it to the top! Hunter Valley was perfect - the cottage which we stayed in was magical - just as we saw it on the web. I made sure I had a good nice long warm soak in the bath tub - truly heavenly!
Grace and I were proud of ourselves for finding our way to Hunter Valley and back to Sydney city centre without much hiccups. The drive took us about two hours plus each way, with Grace behind the wheel and me with three different maps to figure out which road to take. It was really an eye-opening experience!
I fell sick when I reached Sydney city after the two nights at Hunter Valley. The throat was sore, and that made me avoid all kinds of heaty food, and downing lots of juices instead - which were cheaper than bottled water! So, it wasn't that fun cos I couldn't eat all the "chow-tah" food I loved... and chocolates... and chips... :( I even broke out with fever, used up all the medication I bought, and did all I could to recover, but to no avail. Even on the flight back to Singapore, I was sniffing and sneezing. Medication in Sydney was expensive, so I refused to contribute further to their economy. And so I suffered...
This was probably the only trip I've taken (disregarding all the unenjoyable trips to the country north of us) that made me really miss Singapore. My eyes filled with tears as I looked out of the window on the plane and saw the millions of lights dotting the Singapore skyline. I felt "this is HOME". And so I started taking stock of the things in Singapore I've taken for granted and missed...
1. That I could drink tap water and it tastes good - yes, even if it's mixed with NEW water.
2. That I didn't have to multiply everything by 1.3 to know how much something costs.
3. That chicken costs half the price here.
4. That Fuji apples here are twice as big and half as cheap.
5. That fresh broccoli here is cheaper and nicer.
6. That I could tap my EZ link card
7. That transportation here is much cheaper.
8. That medication here is really really more affordable.
9. That we have nicer TV shows.
10. That we have nicer fireworks.
I really really missed things such as..
1. Soya Bean Milk - and I don't mean the Yeos packet drink kind that the island down under sells at $3.50 for a six-pack!
2. Cheap food
3. Green Tea!
4. MEAT - cos it was so expensive there!
Suddenly, when I was there, I felt all so patriotic to my country. Maybe it was the civil servant in me shining. I felt so grateful for our government for making Singapore it is today. I felt so proud to be a Singaporean! In my head, I was singing the national anthem, I was reciting the pledge, I was singing all kinds of national day songs. It was as if the all the red t-shirts I brought along with me were testimony to my allegiance to my country. I AM SINGAPOREAN!
I am sorry Grace that I was harping almost throughout the trip that I miss Singapore. I hope you don't take it personally. It's not you. It's really the things I miss in Singapore...
Before I left for Sydney, I told myself that I would enjoy this trip as much as I could before I embark on the stressful teaching career. I came back disheartened. I didn't enjoy it as much I would like to (like I did in Hawaii). I didn't meet some hunk, fall in love, inherit a vineyard, nor did I bask in the sun at the all so famous Bondi beach. Nor did I get cheap buys not to be found in Singapore, nor did I come back radiant with a pink glow on my cheeks. Instead, I came back with over-ripe mangoes, almost melted chocolates, and 5kg of cherries for my mum. On top of that, I inherited the Sydney flu, and transformed into an insensitive monster for my travel partner. I came back in a total wreck - a mess.
And now as I gather and look back of all that I've experienced, I am thankful for Sydney - for showing me the things I have taken for granted, for letting me love Singapore more, and most of all, to show me how insensitive and awful I can be at times. I was speaking to Pamela and she told me "When something is bothering you, why don't you deal with it there and there. Just say it." I thought through it, and think - she's right. I think I'd make the trip more enjoyable if I had spoken and said it out, instead of wearing my emotions on my sleeve, and let others do the guessing.
I think I have lots to learn. I still feel that I am in a mess right now. But I know - the new year has begun. It is symbolic of a fresh start for me. Slowly but surely, I know I will figure all these things out.
To Grace - I am sorry the trip was not as good as it should be. If the clock could be turned back, I'm sure I'd do things differently.
Thanks for Sydney... Thanks for Singapore...
I did learn a few things on the trip though, so not all is wasted. And I did manage to climb the Sydney harbour bridge - yes, we made it to the top! Hunter Valley was perfect - the cottage which we stayed in was magical - just as we saw it on the web. I made sure I had a good nice long warm soak in the bath tub - truly heavenly!
Grace and I were proud of ourselves for finding our way to Hunter Valley and back to Sydney city centre without much hiccups. The drive took us about two hours plus each way, with Grace behind the wheel and me with three different maps to figure out which road to take. It was really an eye-opening experience!
I fell sick when I reached Sydney city after the two nights at Hunter Valley. The throat was sore, and that made me avoid all kinds of heaty food, and downing lots of juices instead - which were cheaper than bottled water! So, it wasn't that fun cos I couldn't eat all the "chow-tah" food I loved... and chocolates... and chips... :( I even broke out with fever, used up all the medication I bought, and did all I could to recover, but to no avail. Even on the flight back to Singapore, I was sniffing and sneezing. Medication in Sydney was expensive, so I refused to contribute further to their economy. And so I suffered...
This was probably the only trip I've taken (disregarding all the unenjoyable trips to the country north of us) that made me really miss Singapore. My eyes filled with tears as I looked out of the window on the plane and saw the millions of lights dotting the Singapore skyline. I felt "this is HOME". And so I started taking stock of the things in Singapore I've taken for granted and missed...
1. That I could drink tap water and it tastes good - yes, even if it's mixed with NEW water.
2. That I didn't have to multiply everything by 1.3 to know how much something costs.
3. That chicken costs half the price here.
4. That Fuji apples here are twice as big and half as cheap.
5. That fresh broccoli here is cheaper and nicer.
6. That I could tap my EZ link card
7. That transportation here is much cheaper.
8. That medication here is really really more affordable.
9. That we have nicer TV shows.
10. That we have nicer fireworks.
I really really missed things such as..
1. Soya Bean Milk - and I don't mean the Yeos packet drink kind that the island down under sells at $3.50 for a six-pack!
2. Cheap food
3. Green Tea!
4. MEAT - cos it was so expensive there!
Suddenly, when I was there, I felt all so patriotic to my country. Maybe it was the civil servant in me shining. I felt so grateful for our government for making Singapore it is today. I felt so proud to be a Singaporean! In my head, I was singing the national anthem, I was reciting the pledge, I was singing all kinds of national day songs. It was as if the all the red t-shirts I brought along with me were testimony to my allegiance to my country. I AM SINGAPOREAN!
I am sorry Grace that I was harping almost throughout the trip that I miss Singapore. I hope you don't take it personally. It's not you. It's really the things I miss in Singapore...
Before I left for Sydney, I told myself that I would enjoy this trip as much as I could before I embark on the stressful teaching career. I came back disheartened. I didn't enjoy it as much I would like to (like I did in Hawaii). I didn't meet some hunk, fall in love, inherit a vineyard, nor did I bask in the sun at the all so famous Bondi beach. Nor did I get cheap buys not to be found in Singapore, nor did I come back radiant with a pink glow on my cheeks. Instead, I came back with over-ripe mangoes, almost melted chocolates, and 5kg of cherries for my mum. On top of that, I inherited the Sydney flu, and transformed into an insensitive monster for my travel partner. I came back in a total wreck - a mess.
And now as I gather and look back of all that I've experienced, I am thankful for Sydney - for showing me the things I have taken for granted, for letting me love Singapore more, and most of all, to show me how insensitive and awful I can be at times. I was speaking to Pamela and she told me "When something is bothering you, why don't you deal with it there and there. Just say it." I thought through it, and think - she's right. I think I'd make the trip more enjoyable if I had spoken and said it out, instead of wearing my emotions on my sleeve, and let others do the guessing.
I think I have lots to learn. I still feel that I am in a mess right now. But I know - the new year has begun. It is symbolic of a fresh start for me. Slowly but surely, I know I will figure all these things out.
To Grace - I am sorry the trip was not as good as it should be. If the clock could be turned back, I'm sure I'd do things differently.
Thanks for Sydney... Thanks for Singapore...