My mum

It's 2am in the morning, and I can't sleep. My mum just called. She didn't sound right.

She called me up yesterday morning, asking me to get the next flight back to Singapore. She said she missed home, and wasn't enjoying herself. I called Japan Airlines, called her travel agent, and called Simon - my usual travel agent. Simon managed to get her an earlier flight back into Singapore that sees her arriving on Christmas eve. I was elated that I did all of that, considering JAL and her travel agent said all flights were full. I thought she'd be happy. But when I called her just two hours ago, she sounded dazed, almost drugged.

She took down the details that I told her, and said she'd have her tickets changed. But less than an hour after I called her, and less than 15 minutes after I decided to go to bed, I was awoken by the ringing of the telephone. It was mum. She said she called the airline office over her side, and they could get her a flight back into Singapore this Saturday night. I need to call Simon later today to release the booking on this side, so that she can pick it up on her side. Again, she didn't sound right. She spoke in monosyllabic words, almost incoherent. I asked if she was OK. She said she was. But I could sense her voice was breaking into tears, but I don't know why.

I felt helpless as I tried to get back to sleep. Questions raced through my head, wondering why she wanted to come back so soon. She said she wasn't enjoying herself. She said she felt "stifled". I wondered what could have gone wrong. Mixed emotions filled my heart as I said "bye" to her on the phone. I was sad and angry. I just don't like to see my mum cry.

My heart softens for my mum. I love her too much. I've seen her suffer as she brought me and my brother up, and I made a promise to myself that when I can, I'd make life as meaningful and fulfilling as possible. Now that I am working, the tables are turned as I take over the role of taking care of my mum. I let her enjoy the finer things in life when I can afford it. It is a simple sacrifice compared to what she has gone through. It makes me happy to see her happy. I've seen her cry too many times. Probably that's why I hate to see her cry... It just brings back bad memories.

I hope mum is OK. I hope her spirits will be lifted as she packs in preparation to come back home. I hope that she'll smile again when she sees my brother and I. I look forward to hugging her, and welcoming her back home. I do miss her.

If I could have a wish for Christmas, I wish that my mum will be the happiest person on earth this Christmas. I hope that's not too much to ask for.