My students

After my second lesson teaching the class I have been assigned to teach, I have taken an affinity to my students. No, they are not your darling bunch of students that respond to your every single call, nor do they participate in class. They talk when they're not supposed to, and keep quiet when they're supposed to talk. The limerick activity I had prepared for them didn't go too well with them today. They must have been wondering what I was up to making them read poems about Betty and her butter and some flea and fly in some soup. For a moment in class today, I felt lost. I didn't know what to do to get their attention like the last time I did when I wowed them with pronunciation.

But why do I have this affinity to them then?

I feel happy that despite how much I feel drained each time I step out of their class, I also feel a sense of fulfilment - that I was able to reach out to some of them, bit by bit. Extra time today in class allowed me to give them some pep talk. I pointed out their strengths and commended them for being responsible young adults. They must have been surprised. What in the world is this teacher talking about?! If I could, I would have gone on longer, but the bell rang. After lessons, I went up to the girl that usually sleeps in all lessons for staying awake in my class. She gave me a shy smile. I think she was proud of herself too.

Two guys in one corner were thankful I didn't embarrass them in class by scolding them for plugging in their earphones at when I was speaking. They thought I didn't notice the wires that came out from their bag to their ears. They looked at me as I spoke, acting as though they didn't do anything wrong. All I did was to simply address the whole class while looking at them that I do notice the little wrongs they do in class sometimes. But by me keeping quiet does not mean I condone it. It is because I treat them as young adults capable of knowing right from wrong. Almost immediately, the earphones came off. After class, I went up to the two boys and told them I didn't want to see them repeating that behaviour again. They looked apologetically at me. I hope I got the message across to them.

I'm hoping that as the days pass, I am able to touch the lives of my kids - one by one. After reading their journals, I realise that there is so much angst in them - anger, frustration, hatred and confusion. I don't blame them. It is at this age that they experience change in their lives. I step out of my class each day, and ask myself "What can I do to inspire them? What can I do to make them see the positive side of things?"

These thoughts motivate me, and reinforce my calling to teach. I feel I need to do something to make a difference in their lives. I know I can. I believe I can. And if I ever get discouraged along the way, may I never fail to remember that there is always something to love in every child. There is always something good. I just have to focus on this good, and magnify it a thousand times.

I can't believe I'm saying this - but I'm beginning to love these kids that drain me out every day.