Nothing

A million thoughts going thru my mind. A tension. An argument. A debate. Why this? Why that? What happened? Questions asked, but there's no answer. I ask and ask. No answer. Nothing.

When someone asks me what's wrong. I'd rather keep it to myself. I say "Nothing". They probe, I say "Nothing". So what's wrong with "nothing"?

Many a times, we have so many things inside our hearts, inside our minds, but we'd rather keep it in us. We probably haven't figured out what it is that's troubling us, that's why we rather not say. The ironical part of it, I find is that when we actually talk about it, we feel better - I learnt.

My CPA tutor (the nice one), told us today that when we teach in class, we don't really need to shout, or say too much in class. Sometimes, silence means a thousand words. You just say nothing.

And you ask yourself why is this silence so powerful?

When I get angry, I'd rather keep it inside of me. I'd rather not talk to the person I am angry with at the moment, just in case I flare up, and say things I do not mean. So I choose to say nothing.

Silence. Peace. That's what I'm enjoying now. I'm in the CPA lab, all alone. The class has ended, and I'm feeling a lot better than I did this morning. A classmate of mine came up to me and told me to ignore what the other CPA tutor said. He thought my idea was a brilliant one, and that it'd work. My nice CPA tutor told me to ignore the other tutor's comments. "He probably had a long and hard day", he explained. It all helped. Emails of encouragement circulated around the class, each of us encouraging each other that we all did a good job no matter what the other tutor thought. It felt good.

Next Friday, I'm meeting my CPA group members for lunch, to reward ourselves for the work we did. How nice...

The rain comes, but it will go. And a rainbow may emerge. After all, without the rain, there will be no rainbows.