Wendy has grown...

It's a sunny Sunday, and usually, my friend Wendy would be happily tanning herself bronze for at least three hours. She's a sun-worshipper. It's almost her religion. But not today. She's house-hunting with her boyfriend of 10 years. She got up early yesterday morning to take a queue number in pursuit of her dream home in Punggol 21. With her entourage comprising mum and aunts, Punggol was duly examined and disected til legs were sore. But the search still continues on today, just to make sure their choice home will look good both day and night. As I tap on my keyboard now writing this out, she's out with Jeff, looking for yet more options.

She has grown - and I don't mean physically! The Wendy I knew used to put her interests first. She was particular about how she looked, and how others perceived her. Things had to circle around her. But deep inside, she has a kind heart. And I am proud and happy to say that she's showing this side of her more and more. Her responsibilities now do not lie just around what she wants, but more about what others want. She's sensitive to what others feel, and she's more down to earth. She's beginning to plan more and more about her future with Jeff. She's sure he's the right one for her. And I'm happy for her.

As a friend who had a thinking more mature than her age, I was always the one guiding and advising her how things should be done, how she should improve, how she should approach life. There was a stage I wondered how long more I had to look out for her. Maybe I was looking out too much. Slowly but steadily, Wendy has become more independent, and really more lovable. She's showing her inner strength and character, which really is very charming. She cares less if her abs are not as hard, or if her "bye-byes" are waving more than usual. Other things in life matter more. Her future, her job, her education, her life with Jeff.

It seems like she has taken her own road to walk, away from my guiding hand. And I feel like a proud parent seeing her child walk on his own. I don't take credit for what she is today. It just warms my heart to know that she's doing fine and well.. very well, in fact.

That leaves me to think and ponder about my life. Something struck me when I was out with Lee Yee and Pris yesterday. Lee Yee was talking about baby Keith. Pris and I bombarded her with questions about raising kids. She's planning for another one proabably next year. Pris is getting married, and soon, she'll have her kids too. I pondered for a moment if I'd ever have a chance to have my own child. I never thought I'd come to stage where I will announce that my biological clock is ticking. But I guess I'd have to say it is. No, I am not desperate. I just want to experience the joy of having and loving my own child, raising him/her together with the man I love. Sometimes I ask if that is too much to ask?

One by one, my closest friends are setting up their own families. I really do admire them. I feel it's a big step to take. It's almost like a transition to adulthood. Wasn't it just yesterday we were in our school uniforms? Now, we're all grown, busy with our lives, and setting up families. In a way, I feel left behind. But yet again, maybe the path I should take is different. I don't know. I'll leave it to the BIG one above. He always has a plan. It just takes a while before I can understand what He has in store for me. In the meantime, I'll just have to be patient. Good things are worth waiting for.